... Recommend this page to a friend. WAS IT GOOD OR WAS IT EVIL? HAVE I DONE WELL - OR ILL? "We should remember our dying and try to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world" ... by John Steinbeck A child may ask, "What is the world's story about?" And a grown man or woman may wonder, "What way will the world go? How does it end, and while we're at it, what's the story about?" I believe that there is one story in the world, and only one, that has frightened and inspired us, so that we live in a serial of continuing thought and wonder. Humans are caught - in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too - in a net of good and evil. I think this is the only story we have and that it occurs on all levels of feeling and intelligence. Virtue and vice were warp and woof of our first consciousness, and they will be the fabric of our last, and this despite any changes we may impose on river and mountain, on economy and manners. There is no other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have only the hard, clean questions: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well - or ill?... And in our time, when a man dies - if he has had wealth and influence and power and all the vestments that arouse envy, and after the living take stock of the dead man's property and his eminence and works and monuments - the question is still there: Was his life good or was it evil? - which is another way of putting Croesus's question. Envies are gone, and the measuring stick is: "Was he loved or was he hated? Is his death felt as a loss or does a kind of joy come from it?" I remember clearly the deaths of three men. One was the richest man of the century, who, having clawed his way to wealth through the souls and bodies of men, spent many years trying to buy back the love he had forfeited and by that process performed great service to the world and, perhaps, had much more than balanced the evils of his rise. I was on a ship when he died. The news was posted on the bulletin board, and nearly everyone received the news with pleasure. Several said, "Thank G-d that son of a bitch is dead." There was a man, smart as Satan, who, lacking some perception of human dignity and knowing all too well every aspect of human weakness and wickedness, used his special knowledge to warp men, to buy men, to bribe and threaten and seduce until he found himself in a position of great power. He clothed his motives in the name of virtue, and I have wondered whether he knew that no gift will ever buy back a man's love when you have removed his self-love. A bribed man can only hate his briber. When this man died the nation rang with praise and, just beneath, with gladness that he was dead. There was a third man, who perhaps made many errors in performance but whose effective life was devoted to making men brave and dignified and good in a time when they were poor and frightened and when ugly forces were loose in the world to utilize those fears. This man was hated by the few. When he died the people burst into tears in the streets and their minds wailed, "What can we do now? How can we go on without him?" In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed, most of their vices are attempted short cuts to love. When a man comes to die, no matter what his talents and influence and genius, if he dies unloved his life must be a failure to him and his dying a cold horror. It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world. We have only one story. All novels, all poetry, are built on the never-ending contest in ourselves of good and evil. And it occurs to me that evil must constantly respawn, while good, while virtue, is immortal. Vice has always a new fresh young face, while virtue is venerable as nothing else in the world is. WHAT IS GOOD ... WHAT IS NOT Often we have to sift through that which is presented to us in the world and discern what is good, what is productive and beneficial, and what is not. As the saying goes, seeing is believing. When we hear about something, we are not always sure if we heard right, if we misunderstood. Seeing is a much higher level of comprehension and reality. It is up to us to discern what is positive and what is not, what is good and what is not. Usually we have a fair idea what the ultimate outcome of our actions will be. This allows us to see if it is a good idea or not. WHERE AM I GOING? Sometimes it helps to know where you are coming from. All of us have embarked upon many journeys throughout our lives, both physically and spiritually. We make many stops along the way. These stops are important; they are rungs on the ladder, stages on the way to our destination. It is all too easy, once we get there, to forget about the stages we passed along the way. Sometimes we forget about the people who helped us along the way. We have to remind ourselves that even though we may have reached our destination, we should always be cognizant of the path that brought us there and not to take for granted those who have encouraged and guided us throughout our "journeys". Those previous stages may seem like mere 'stepping stones' now that we have reached our goal, but they are nonetheless important. At the time, they represented a journey, progress, a step closer to our destination. They are still important now as without them we would not be where we are today. It's called "knowing your roots, where you came from". An example ... A young boy is traveling from X to Y. He arrives at a four-way crossroads and discovered, to his horror, that the sign has fallen down. Now he has no way to know which road to take to reach his destination. What is he to do? The answer is simple. He knows where he is coming from - X. By arranging the sign so that X points to the path he had just come from, he is able to figure out which way to go. When we know where we have come from, we can know where we are going to. THE LIFE CYCLE IS BACKWARDS Of course I agree with Steinbeck (see above), but here's another most profound thought on the subject: The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. What I mean is, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. And then you die. What's that? A bonus? I think the life-cycle is all backwards. You should die first (like coming from another world) and get it all over with. Then you live in an old age home (you won't be there too long). You get kicked out when you're too young; let's say 85. You live with your children 10-15 years (don't ask me where they came from). You get a gold watch (ah, you're going to have that a long time). You go to work (you're old enough and smart enough to choose a comfy career). You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol and party (this isn't my style but you do have choices). You get ready for high school (and you're smart enough to know about s-x). You go to grade school and become a kid (still nice to know all about s-x). You play. You have no responsibilities (all you know is everything about s-x). You become a little baby and go back into the womb (finally, after all that poking). You spend your last nine months floating~~~~~~~ (tilde symbols mean floating) Then, you finish off as an orgasm (your last experience with s-x). Not a bad idea; I like it. So we return to ... Menu ... or to the ... Next Page ... Ayn Rand Says.